Category: Thoughts

Posted on

ZEN Teachings

Thanks to my Dad for sending these to me! I hope they bring some laughs to you as well.

  1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me for the path is narrow. In fact, leave me alone.
  2. Sex is like air. It’s not that important unless you aren’t getting any.
  3. No one is listening until you fart.
  4. Always remember you’re unique. Just like everyone else.
  5. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
  6. If you think nobody cares whether you’re alive or dead, try missing a couple of mortgage payments.
  7. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you’re a mile away and you have their shoes.
  8. If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving is not for you.
  9. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
  10. If you lend someone $20.00 and never see that person again, it was probably well worth it.
  11. If you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember anything.
  12. Some days you are the dog, some days you are the tree.
  13. Don’t worry; it only seems kinky the first time.
  14. Good judgment comes from bad experience … and most of that comes from bad judgment.
  15. A closed mouth gathers no foot.
  16. There are two excellent theories for arguing with women. Neither one works.
  17. Generally speaking, you aren’t learning much when your lips are moving.
  18. Experience is something you don’t get until just after you need it.
  19. We are born naked, wet and hungry, and get slapped on our ass, then things just keep getting worse from there.
  20. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.


Posted on

Planet Z Theorem

Someone today asked me explain my Planet Z Theorem to them. What the heck is that? Well, let me tell you!

Have you ever had a feeling that something was happening that you could not put your finger on? You just know something is going on, someone is doing something that will impact you. It may be comments from people or a strange set of occurrences. Its just a feeling you get. And then – boom – that “something” is revealed to you – your instincts were correct.

I call this my Planet Z theorem. Two thoughts lead me to this:

1 – In planetary science we can often infer that certain things are occuring which we can not see due to how other objects are effected by gravity. In fact, scientists today are looking for “new Earths” using a variant of this – by looking for a certain wobble in a star or shadows of objects in front of stars we can infer that a planet we can not see exists. They can also calculate the path of planets in a stellar system and compare to what they actually see. If there is a difference between what they compute and what they see – they must be missing something! Come on, you watch the Discovery channel don’t you?

2 – My father tells an amazing story (yeah – multiple times) about a physcology class he took during his undergraduate studies. Their professor brought in a person whom was supposedly crazy and had been abducted by aliens so that the class could interview them. This person told the class that the aliens showed him a planet we didn’t know about (lets call it Planet Z so this all makes sense) out in the far reaches of our solar system. He also told the class that the aliens took his very old dog and placed him into a machine which made the very old dog a puppy again. Scientists later discovered the planet – Pluto – and I have hope someday I will be abducted and get some of my dogs back!

So when you have a feeling that something is going on and your feeling the “gravity” of a situation or sense a set of decisions you may not be aware of have been made that your just not aware of yet – trust your gut – its Planet Z.

I use this gut instinct to make me think more about what may be happening, or how I may be impacting others around me in ways I did not initially understand.

There have been times when there was no “Planet Z” either, so this might just be a bunch of hokum. Maybe I am just becoming paranoid in my middle age.

Posted on

// hello world

About time I started a blog. I need to get in the habit both personally and professionally.

I don’t do Facebook. I haven’t now for over year and overall really don’t miss it. Linda keeps me up-to-date with what’s going on in our extended circle of friends and we both keep in touch with my family and close friends personally.

One thing I do miss about Facebook is being able to go back and look at what I have done in the past as reminders for me. Also I plan to use this as a sort of personal Wikipedia of things I need to reference. So personal and professional project related stuff here mostly. I shall see.

Some of it may be boring to you, some not. This will be an experiment for me and may disappear at any time – I will see what happens and adjust. Fail fast, One Life Life It!